Jun E Caniel

Ladies, Mind Your Business!

In Daily Inspiration, Jun E Gives, Thoughts on June 24, 2011 at 1:07 am

Ladies, mind your own business!  I mean this not in regard to gossip (although some of you need to learn to avoid that as well), but in regard to minding the business of YOUR life, goals, dreams, aspirations, etc.  I have been talking to friends of both genders lately, and I see a trend of women (young and old) minding everyone’s business but their own.

What I mean is that we women tend to support and nurture everyone’s dreams but our own.  We throw ourselves into making sure we are there for our significant others, we are super woman to our kids, and we slave at our 9 to 5.  We put pressure on ourselves to be everything, but what do we do for ourselves?  Surely we cannot expect getting our hair and nails done to be enough to sustain us? We need internal maintenance as well.

Ladies, we have to mind our own dreams and goals.  We have to invest in ourselves spiritually and mentally.  It is our responsibility to successfully maintain our individual lives.  We are also responsible for OUR happiness.  Despite popular belief, our precious happiness is in our own hands.  Though it is not easy, we can find a balance and we can make time to achieve our individual goals and find our happiness. It can be as simple as taking up a new hobby that fulfills a need to be creative or volunteering for a cause that is dear to you.

You are not much good to anyone else if you have nothing going on for yourself.  Women all over the world are socialized to put their dreams on hold to support the seemingly more important goals of men. I have been guilty of the same things.  I’ve readily put my own search for my purpose on hold so that I could be most supportive to my husband.  While his priority was finding himself and working on his own goals, mine was to be the “best wife” I could be to him.  Never mind that I had no individual purpose or direction in my life.  I was a shell because I had reduced myself to being a wife and nothing more.  What then, was I bringing to the table?  I was puppet of my own making.  I felt void, empty.

Before I can be the best anything to anyone else, I have to be the best Tiya.  The same goes for you.  This is not always easy because I am still learning how to successfully wear and interchange my different hats, however I find contentment in knowing I am pursuing my own goals and dreams as well.  Nothing can take that away.  In the slim chance my marriage does not work and I lose all of my loved ones and possessions, I know I will be fine because I know who I am and what I am purposed for in this world.  With this self-knowledge I am able to be a better artist, wife, sister, friend, business woman, mentor, and whatever else I decide to be.

I implore that you make it a point to put yourself first, and do NOT apologize.  Men do it all the time and you never hear an apology or admittance of guilt or regret.  Ladies and Jun E women, if you do not put yourself first, no one else will.  Until next blog, stay Jun E and love yourself enough!

T caniel

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